Treating guests to dinner, trying to mix circles, please stop ineffective social networking, this is the truth of networking
When you open the address book, you find that you actually have hundreds of friends, and your connections are really wide. Looking at each name, you forget who they are and what has happened to you. I participated in a lot of circle activities last year. It seems that I know a lot of people. I left a business card and added WeChat. In fact, few people still remember our name.
Every month I spend a lot of money to treat guests to dinner, and everyone at the dinner table is called brotherhood. When it is really difficult, few people are willing to lend a helping hand. As the book "Please Stop Ineffective Socialization" says: Your socialization has only quantity, not quality. Only by understanding the truth of these 3 points of connections can you make true friends and have effective connections.
The foundation of effective socializing is mutual recognition
As soon as Xiao Zhang became a self-media creator, he was fortunate to join the self-media big V group. He immediately added big V groups everywhere and actively asked questions in the group. As a result, within a week, he was blocked by various big V, and no one Willing to answer his question again. The situation of Xiao Zhang is very common in the self-media industry. Many newbies have done this and want to make contacts at a higher level, but have you ever thought about whether the other party recognizes you? If not, why should a big V be unilateral? serve you.
A friend is also a novice in the self-media, but he has a writing foundation, and he does not hesitate to spend money to join the training camp of a big V. He actively completes his homework. fee. The big V tutor is also fully supported, helping him apply for various green channels, traffic support, and introducing other big Vs to him. In the final analysis, only if we gain the recognition of each other in terms of ability or value, can we have further opportunities to make friends, otherwise we will only be regarded as clowns by others.
Effective people need to know how to use multiple
It is said that the network needs to be operated. The best way to operate is not to please people all the time, but to "trouble" others more, and then express gratitude and send a red envelope after the trouble. Friends don't need to be afraid of trouble. Occasionally, if something troubles each other, the other party can feel their sense of existence and value, and the deeper their friendship with us. It is also necessary to "use more" for high-level contacts. After using it, you should give feedback. If you encounter difficulties, ask the leader for help. After you are done, ask the leader to have a meal and express your admiration for the leader. The leader is naturally comfortable, much better than flattering. .
"Using" contacts is also skillful. You can't find too simple questions. Otherwise, the other party thinks that we are not sincere and asks questions or troubles others. It must be worthy of the other party's action, but it must be within the range that the other party can handle, just like playing a game. Challenging, but not too difficult. When things are done, we regularly feedback good information, send a hard fee, or invite a meal, strengthen exchanges, and mutual recognition is higher.
Effective contacts should be focused and socialized appropriately
The greatest respect a person can get socially is his unique position in the other person's heart. There are hundreds of people on your WeChat, and the other party may think it’s nothing, but if you have only a few dozen people on WeChat, and ordinary friends don’t add WeChat, the other party will feel that they are greatly respected in your address book. We do not despise others, but we must also learn to treat them differently, so that the people we value can feel respect and sincerity, and are more willing to communicate with us.
To make effective contacts, you need to focus on it, don’t participate in all social activities, don’t know everyone, have a personality and know how to respect others, and it’s easier to be recognized by others. Focus on platforms that can better reveal high-end contacts, such as industry salons, circle exchanges, etc. Focus on contacts with people who recognize each other, lack of energy, and appropriately give up friends who do not communicate very much. Remember, when we can't use it, it is no longer our network, stop trying to please, turn around and make more friends who can communicate with each other as equals.