Friendship needs to be dense

Friends should be close to each other, and they must not rely on their close relationship with friends without any scruples. As an old Chinese saying goes: "When you meet, you can only talk about three points, and you can't throw everything away." An excessively intimate friendship may undergo qualitative changes. The higher you get, the heavier you fall. Once a relationship that is too close is broken, the cracks will widen, and friends will inevitably become enemies.

People are often the most vulnerable to their best and closest friends. Just as one's nerves are always loose in a safe place, when you are socializing with friends, you may only notice that your friendship is gradually deepening, and you can talk about everything together every day. To outsiders you can proudly say, "There are no secrets between us." But all too often it does harm to you. Maybe one day, you burst into a friend's house excitedly, and shouted while throwing the raindrops from your hair, while your friend was panicking and hiding something. At this time, please don't ask, because this is his unique secret, and you also don't think that he intentionally alienates you and doesn't trust you because of this.

Friends keep secrets not because they don't trust you, but because they're responsible for themselves. You also need to keep your own secrets, and none of this proves that you are estranged from your friends; on the contrary, wise people would consider such friendships more reliable. You're bound to lose your friends if you're preoccupied with it. Similarly, when your friend feels embarrassed or unwilling to disclose some private secrets, you should not forcefully ask, let alone eavesdropping, peeping or secretly asking about your friend's secrets because of your good relationship, because the secrets are kept secret. is his right. Under normal circumstances, for some sensitive and irritating things that belong to a friend, the public power should be left to the friend himself. Eavesdropping or exposing friends' secrets without authorization is a taboo in making friends. In addition, being rude to a friend is the most likely to hurt your friend, and it is also easy to hurt yourself. Its manifestations are as follows, and you must not be careful to restrain yourself.

1. Excessive performance, inadvertent speech, bruising the self-esteem of friends

When you are with a friend, if you are too sharp and express yourself too much, there will be a sense of superiority in your speech, which will make your friend feel that you are talking to him condescendingly, and you are deliberately showing off and elevating yourself, his self-esteem. Will be bruised, can not help but keep away from you. Therefore, when interacting with friends, you should control your emotions, keep your senses, be humble, put yourself on an equal footing with the other party, and pay attention to the existence of the other party at all times.

2. Do not separate each other, violate the agreement, and make friends take precautions against you

The most inattentive thing among friends is the careless handling of their friends' belongings. They often think "what is the difference between friends?". For friends' belongings, they take and use them without permission, do not cherish them, and sometimes return them late or not. Once or twice, a friend is embarrassed to accuse you because of affection. Over time, it will make him think that you are too presumptuous, and thus develop a defensive psychology.

3. Take advantage of people's unpreparedness, forcibly ask for it, and make friends think that you are too unreasonable and domineering

When you have something to ask for someone, of course, your friend is the first choice, but you do not notice in advance, you come to the door to ask for your request; Dilemma. It will be even more embarrassing for him if he already has an activity arrangement and it is inconvenient to change it. For your request, if he agrees, he will disrupt his plan, and if he refuses, he will feel bad about it. Maybe he is willing to do it on the surface, but there is always a bit of unhappiness in his heart, thinking that you are too domineering and unreasonable. Therefore, when you have a request for a friend, you must inform it in advance, speak in a consultative tone, and try to ask your friend on the premise of nothing or willingness.

4. Unaware of current affairs, slow response, making friends disgusted with you

When you visit a friend's house, if you encounter a friend who is studying, receiving guests, meeting with a lover, or preparing to go out, etc., you may think of yourself as a close friend, regardless of the time and occasion, without looking at your friend's face, sitting for a long time, Talking rhetorically and arrogantly taking over the host, but regardless of the fact that people are already sitting on pins and needles, they are extremely impatient. In this way, friends will definitely think that you are too uneducated, ignorant of current affairs, and unfriendly, and will try to avoid you in the future, fearing that you will disturb his private life again.

5. Make friends with generalities and exaggerate, making friends feel that you are a frivolous person

You may be driven by vanity, or you may be eager to make friends, thinking that the more friends you make, the better your skills will be and the better your popularity will be. As a result, you often indiscriminately investigate, generalize about yourself, and suffer from "good friends". At this time, your friend is already sneering slightly, thinking that you are a frivolous person, and you should not get along with each other sincerely, but you will lose your true friend. Therefore, when making friends, you should treat each other sincerely and have a single-minded feeling. You must not think that the pan-fellowship will make you prominent.

Perhaps, anyone has had such an experience and feeling that they are very close to a certain person or a few people, they can talk, and they feel warm when they sit together. It is good to be inseparable. However, this closeness often ends in a heart-wrenching separation and is likely to cause irreparable wounds. In fact, once a wound occurs, no matter how well it heals, it will inevitably leave a scar; just like a crack on a porcelain, no matter how thin it is, it will always leave a trace that cannot be erased or wiped away. Isn't that the reason for the loss of measure?

When making friends, if you grasp the principle of "smooth like water, harmony without flow", you will be able to handle friendships with ease. Your relationship with your friends is light but not light, far but not far away. Friends will praise you for being considerate, modest and generous, respectful and trustworthy, and bystanders will also praise you for your dedication, courtesy, and impeccability to your friends. , you will naturally be admired and loved by others.