Employees with real emotional intelligence: understand silence, dare to express their opinions, and will hate others

A few days ago, a reader privately messaged me, saying that I was very unhappy working in the unit, and I worked hard every day. When I met the boss, nodding and bowing, I only made promises. They also took the initiative to pay for it, but the boss didn’t seem to be interested in him. He never gave priority to him for promotion and salary increase. When colleagues needed help, they looked for him, but they never regarded him as their own, nor did they call him for meals.

He asked me, is it because his emotional intelligence is too low, too good at communicating with people, too good at flattering the boss?

What kind of emotional intelligence do we need in the workplace?

In my opinion, employees with really high emotional intelligence generally have three qualities: they understand silence, dare to express their opinions, and they will hate others!

01

understand silence

Many people believe that only those who are articulate and articulate in the workplace can be recognized by leaders and colleagues, can effectively display their talents and abilities, and have more opportunities for promotion and salary increases. Those who are reticent They are all called "stuffy gourds", and they are said to be dull, and even some introverted people deliberately show more words in front of their colleagues. However, sometimes, silence is a skill that people in the workplace should learn more.

As the saying goes, "calamity comes out of the mouth, and disease comes in through the mouth". In front of the leaders, he talked endlessly, eloquently, and made reckless statements. Only when he really started to work did he feel that he was too good at work, and had nowhere to start. Finally, he was labelled as a good hand and a low hand.

Chattering, chattering in front of colleagues, even being stubborn and aggressive on trivial matters, and arguing with others, naturally disgusting colleagues, saying 10,000 words of apology will not restore your relationship, and the relationship breaks down because of one sentence Is it still less?

People with really high emotional intelligence never talk nonsense, but hit the nail on the head and cherish words like gold;

People with really high emotional intelligence are never involved in the office politics of people talking behind their backs, because no one knows whether the person you are talking about really doesn't know;

A person with a high emotional intelligence never interrupts when others are talking, even if he knows that what others are saying makes no sense.

Real professionals know how to be silent, only rookies chatter.

Employees with real emotional intelligence: understand silence, dare to express their opinions, and will hate others

In the workplace, knowing silence has 3 benefits:

①Save time and improve efficiency

In the workplace, a large part of our time is wasted discussing irrelevant issues with others, parental short stories or even gossip. We keep silent on these irrelevant issues, which allows us to have more time to focus on our own work, even if When you are not busy with work, you can also use this time to enrich your knowledge reserve, and finally achieve the effect of accumulating wealth. Appropriate silence can make you silently grow into a powerful faction!

②Control your emotions and avoid conflict

People who know how to be silent are more able to effectively control their emotions. At work, we often encounter situations that are inconsistent with the opinions of our leaders and colleagues. If we cannot control our emotions and get angry, violent verbal conflicts may break out at this time. If we can control our emotions in a timely manner and know how to be silent, we can effectively avoid the intensification of conflicts and leave room for us to express our views.

③Self-indulgence and reliable work

In the workplace, it is inevitable to encounter the phenomenon of gangs and gangs. If you encounter such a thing, choose to be reasonable and silent. Although you may be considered to be out of the group on the surface, it also effectively avoids being affected by office politics and will be considered by leaders. Simple-minded, conscientious and responsible for work, reliable, honest and reliable, he will often receive the effect of "snipe and clam fighting, and the fisherman will benefit".

02

dare to take a stand

Employees with real emotional intelligence: understand silence, dare to express their opinions, and will hate others

Some friends are obedient to the leader, nervous when they see the leader, and they feel intimidated when they talk to the leader. Whatever the leader says is regarded as a decree, and they never dare to express their attitude to the leader, and sometimes they even know that the leader's ideas are wrong. Dare to express your own opinions. If this goes on like this, the leader will think that he is just a rookie without a head. Not only will he not reuse you, but he will target you everywhere, and even come to you to vent his anger.

You must understand that in the workplace, there is no need for "honest people" who are blindly loyal, "old scalpers" who only know how to lower their heads to pull cars and never look up at the road, and do not need "workplace" who have no attitude towards everything invisible Man".

The final fate of these types of people can only be marginalized, there is no possibility of any progress, and even the first group of people to be eliminated.

Of course, the statement mentioned here is not a random statement of one's views without principles, nor is it a "rejection expert" who denies all the opinions of the leaders, but expresses one's own points with reason and evidence.

In the workplace, there are 3 principles to follow:

① Grasp the time and occasion

The timing must be right. When the leader expresses his own point of view, do not express his position immediately, but first understand the leader's intention, especially the attitude of the superior leader, and must not let his point of view stand on the opposite side of the company's interests. The location of the statement should also be selected reasonably. Generally, it is not possible to openly sing opposite the leader in a crowded situation, and try to choose a place where both parties are comfortable to express their views.

②In line with your own identity

We must grasp our own role positioning, and we must not say anything that is not in line with our own identity, so as not to cause offside. If you are not in your position, do not seek political affairs, and are not your own, you should not express your opinion at will. This will affect the relationship between colleagues and put you in a dilemma. Your opinion is generally not recognized by the leadership.

③ Consider the consequences of your statement

Before expressing your stance, you must think twice, and you must consider the consequences of expressing your stance and how it will affect you. If confronted with conflicts between leaders or disputes between colleagues, you should be good at "making peace with the mud" and stay away. If you have to make a statement at this time, it is best to be vague and talk about him.

03

will hate people

Employees with real emotional intelligence: understand silence, dare to express their opinions, and will hate others

In the workplace, we pay attention to a group of harmony, and pay attention to how you are, I am good to everyone, but after a long time, you will find that your perseverance not only does not make you gain good popularity, but makes everyone think you are "cowardly". Ride on your head and shit.

The practice of forcing yourself to be angry, breaking your teeth and swallowing in your stomach, is not a measure, it is incompetence, and there is nothing you can do.

You are also kind, and the more you swallow your voice, the more you will encourage some people's arrogance.

In the face of unfair treatment and wanton bullying by others, we cannot avoid it. We must dare to fight back and fight back bravely!

In the face of these situations, we must bravely fight back:

① wanton bullying

In the workplace, some people are bullying the weak and afraid of the tough. They like to bully endlessly good-tempered colleagues who don’t know how to resist. They even regard bullying others as their own profession. Leaders sometimes do the same thing, and they especially like to vent their anger on people who have no temper. Sometimes, when you make a small mistake, you are told or even laughed at by others. At this time, in the face of this kind of wanton bullying, you must fight back bravely and kill the chickens as an example, otherwise you will become doomed.

② Framed behind the scenes

Some people especially like to "chew the tongue" and talk about people behind their backs. A lot of things, even if you didn't do it, they are behind the rumors that you did it, and even said it with nose and eyes. At this time, if you don't get angry, they will not only intensify, but even have no scruples, and develop to the situation of bullying you face to face. !

③ Being excluded

In the workplace, some people don't see good in others. If you are excellent in a certain aspect, they feel that their personal interests are harmed, and they will unite with some "mediocre talents" to squeeze you out in their own way. At this time, you must fight back and strive for Your own interests, otherwise, in the long run, your enterprising spirit will be greatly damaged.