Some time ago, there was a short video that exploded the circle of friends. It was called "There are no miracles in life". For us ordinary people, it is not the point of miracles. The road is getting firmer and wider.

The author of this article (Qing Qiu Mo) is a girl who tutored Sister Haoyou. When she sat down and sorted out her experience, she was already on the road to success.

The story is a bit long, is there a shadow of you in the story?

In April 2019, I came to Shanghai for two full years.

The experience of these two years may be enough to catch up with the experience and knowledge of the previous five years. However, being able to recognize these has paid a considerable price in life so far.

[Background] Failed in the postgraduate entrance examination - going out of the hometown

In 2017, two years after graduating, I failed the postgraduate entrance examination. When I learned my grades, I seemed to have completely lost confidence in life and had no clear understanding of the future.

One day, I suddenly wanted to leave my hometown where I stayed for more than 20 years and go to a first-tier city to try.

Maybe it's the big city dream that has already existed.

Maybe an escape.

Booked tickets quickly and went to Shanghai without telling anyone, including my parents.

But I told Sister Weihaoyou that she had the courage to come to Shanghai, and she gave me the greatest support.

Non-stop sending resumes, interviews, onboarding. Buried into this international metropolis, and then quickly disappeared into the vast crowd.

What is the workplace situation like in first-tier cities?

Can I handle the pressure here?

I have no idea.

A friend of mine has been in Shanghai for two years. For those of us at that stage, she has earned a lot of money in the past two years. She was my only refuge after I came to Shanghai. What helped me the most was renting a temporary housing for me in Pudong.

One side of the house is against the wall, and the other three sides are surrounded by wooden boards, which are connected with the other roofs. The house is about to be demolished, 500 yuan a month.

Although I have graduated for two years, I have no real work experience related to the industry, except for the internship in the school's local newspaper when I graduated from the university, so it is still equivalent to a fresh graduate, starting from the most basic positions and taking the minimum standards. salary.

[Adaptation] One and a half years in the first company, with mixed flavors.

Work has grown rapidly, but also suffered a lot.

The first is fast pace. When I didn’t get to Shanghai, I heard a senior student who worked hard in Beijing for two or three years say, “First-tier cities are faster-paced.” Busy I accept ah, I like the busy state, full!

The reality is far beyond my imagination.

It takes an hour or two to get to work, and in order to guarantee a full attendance bonus of 200 yuan a month, I have to race against time to catch the subway;

Being dug by unscrupulous colleagues at work, leading to the leader's belief that his work attitude and ability are not good enough, and he could hardly stay in the company for a while;

The manuscript has been changed to the Nth time, just to show the leader a satisfactory work in the morning of the next day, and work overtime until two or three in the morning;

After perfecting the plan N times, the manuscript was overturned and rejected for various reasons when it was about to be submitted. The overtime and scolding for half a month had to be endured, and the grievances lasted until late at night.

Because of staying up all night, my body was in a condition for a time, and I, who weighed less than 100 pounds, lost 10 pounds quickly after coming to Shanghai.

But luckily, the effort paid off.

When I explain my plan to leaders or customers and get approval, when I see that my plan has become a part of the customer's brand, when I go through several overnights with my colleagues to make the event come to a successful conclusion, I will sincerely sigh, That's what I want the job to feel like.

With the increase of work experience, wages rose (more than 9,000), and economic conditions gradually improved.

In the past two years, through constant attempts and contacts, I have discovered my own strengths and slowly developed them; I have found a field that I love and gradually moved closer to it in my life and work.

Although life and work are fast-paced and stressful, this is the state I want.

Do the work you love, even if there are countless hardships;

Living in a city with feelings, although survival is difficult;

But maybe so far, this is proof that I'm alive.

[Toughest] Leaving my first job, three chaotic short-term experiences almost broke me

The collapse of adults happens quietly. Possibly even without knowing it.

The first job company is very small, so it is recommended that one person has multiple roles. The advantage of this is that I can experience different job contents in a short period of time, but the disadvantage is that it will make me mistakenly think that I know a lot about this industry. I have been through all kinds of things in the industry in a short period of time.

The consequence of this illusion is that when I feel that there is a bottleneck in this company, I have the idea of ​​​​changing jobs, and the most painful price for me is to resign.

Yixin felt that he had experienced a lot and learned a lot in the past year, enough to be independent, so he did not concentrate on looking for a job within a month after he was dismissed. He probably felt that he had no worries about finding a job at all, so one month after leaving the company Just settled on a small start-up company.

In this company, I only stayed for two months. Reason summary: glass heart

A project was handed over to me for about two weeks before and after, with other projects interspersed in the middle, but in the early stage, everyone really didn’t know how deep they should dig, so they did it relatively shallowly, and then they started to do it deeper. In the end, the leader was still dissatisfied. He didn't tell me to hand it over to another colleague to do it. I felt a blow and said I resigned.

Now that I think about myself, it is also very cool. A series of problems are slowly approaching me, but I have no idea.

The second job: Incompetence + Backpacker

For the second one, I was looking for it for about two weeks, and the Chinese New Year is approaching. In addition to the experience of the previous job, I always felt that it was necessary to let them know about my abilities, so every time I had an interview, I would be honest with the interviewer: a project was completely handed over. If you give me a person, I can't control it, because the content of the previous work is relatively complicated, but it is not precise.

Under the circumstance that I could accept my shortcomings, I agreed to join a company, saying that as long as I could do auxiliary work, I would not give the whole program to me to complete.

But the facts were completely unexpected.

I wrote the whole plan, and the direct leaders did not do anything at all. This is actually understandable. As long as it is within the range of my ability, it is all exercise, even if it is different from what I said in the interview.

What I can't bear is that I want to take the blame for him. The project director asked why he didn't write a part. He directly said that I forgot to write it, and he would accuse me loudly in the whole company: What's the matter with you, you are like this I'm really hot (the super loud and super angry kind)! He told me on WeChat in private: After he confronted me, I didn't have time to tell you that you were a little wronged.

The fuse was that a case was approaching the day before the business trip and meeting. Even though we found Freelancer, we still had no idea, but he did not come to the company, and he was not in a hurry. He just urged me on WeChat: You have no idea about the whole plan now. , I'm not in control, I'm going to a meeting tomorrow, it won't work...

I suddenly felt that there was no need to stay any longer. I had no self-confidence here, and it was useless to take the blame for the leadership.

This is the second time to resign.

Third job: cheated (feeling)

With the previous failure experience, it is really powerless to toss, and I feel that it is not bad if a company is willing to ask me. When I entered a company that especially appreciated me during the interview, it said that it valued my logical thinking ability, communication ability and image, etc., and described it as more promising, and admitted that it would not put too much pressure on me. At the time, I didn't think it was particularly in line with my career plan, but some studies are worse than doing it first.

In the past two weeks, the company was still relatively busy. I worked overtime several times together with everyone. When the project was especially urgent and wanted to add a project to me, the leader would show a little embarrassed look: xx, this project may still need to be added. You do it, work hard, don't be under pressure. I think the overall atmosphere is pretty good, although not challenging.

In about two weeks, three projects were independently completed, and there were small projects in the middle. These three plans will be proposed one after another, because this project is not too difficult compared with the previous projects, so they are all completed independently.

But very dramatically, just two weeks later, HR called me into the office and said: We don't think you fit the atmosphere of our company, so you're here today.

Excuse me? Although I don't feel that I have lost a good platform, I don't understand at all, this is the least technical job I have ever experienced, and people still despise me?

The end result was that for two years in Shanghai, I didn't have a single penny in my deposit.

My mother said at the time that I had not been smooth since the second half of last year. If Shanghai is not suitable for you, I should go back to my hometown, find a less stressful job, and move forward slowly.

I also began to doubt myself, could I really not bear the pressure of the first-tier cities?

Is it the first job I just arrived, and the later stage was so smooth that I overestimated my ability?

Is it because my resume is too beautiful, and the strength is not so beautiful?

Could it be that the salary I want is too high, and other people think that I am not worth so much in real work?

Why do I clearly feel that I have a power in my heart, that I have the ability to do well, that I have strong logical thinking and good communication skills, and I can develop in this industry, but the truth seems to be that I can’t do anything?

Where exactly is my problem?

I no longer want to communicate with my friends, and the answer I often get is: Ah, quit again? Just hold on, you...

[Continued] New work and new plans in 2019

After spending the New Year in a hurry, I immediately entered the state of looking for a job when I came back. The work life has been empty for too long, and the anxiety has become more and more serious after the accumulation of several short and chaotic experiences. In order to avoid any mistakes, I chose a company that was much easier than before, but I didn't like the job content at all, and moved back to a remote but cheap rental area, more than an hour away by subway.

I plan to work in this company for 2 years, work hard to improve myself, and at the same time get my undergraduate degree. I hope to be safe and secure, and spend a period of time where I don’t lose my job at any time, and I don’t have to be ready to move all the time.