Confidant｜Are workplace girls acting as delicate as possible?

Today, a girl who was tutoring asked a very interesting question:

Girls in the workplace, is the weaker the better?

My answer: of course, definitely, no!

What is the workplace? On a platform, different people complete the goal of a platform through teamwork, so as to achieve everyone's own demands.

Whether male or female participating in the workplace, they all need to cooperate with others to complete their own work according to quality and quantity on time. Delivering work is the most basic logic in the workplace.

What the job needs most is to meet the job requirements, and it has nothing to do with being delicate or not.

At the same time, I also understand why this girl thinks like this. Probably from her, and a discovery from many others: when girls are weak, they will win the help and support of other colleagues.

This phenomenon itself exists. For example, there is no water in the water dispenser in the office. Adult girls with moderate health have no problem at all to change buckets of water. However, if there are boys around, show weakness and ask boys to change, boys are also very happy.

Or when everyone worked overtime together, one of the girls said aggrieved: It's too late to walk on the road, maybe someone will say: You go back first.

It seems that "weak" can get you some "discounts", so does it mean that "weak" has a certain effect?

On the one hand, if you take "weakness" as the root and hope that others will help you by showing weakness, this will definitely not work in the long run! No one will be willing to help you again and again, even if you look like a fairy; even if you continue to find different people to help you, you will give up the opportunity to exercise your ability and accumulate experience in this matter. In fact, the longer you go, the more you will suffer.

For example, if classmate Yang Chaoyue, who was in the fire in 2018, has not made progress in singing, dancing and performing for many years, his career will definitely be affected.

On the other hand, if you take "collaboration" as the foundation, you don't have to do everything yourself, but take the initiative to find people who can support and cooperate with you, and achieve higher goals together, so that everyone can win. So it's okay to show weakness appropriately, and admit that you can't do it or can't do it.

At this time, it is not actually called weak, but coordination and leadership. This requires self-awareness and self-reflection. The workplace must be collaborative, and doing everything by yourself will eventually limit yourself.

For example, my former boss, a gentle lady, was very weak. I remember once, one of our team employees had a car accident on a business trip. Although everyone was slightly injured, four employees were hospitalized at the same time, which also became a major event that shocked the company.

Then, at the regular meeting after the accident, the female boss choked up after describing the incident. She wiped her tears and said, "Fortunately, no major incident happened. This incident made me very sad. I want you to help me get through this together. Then our departments took the initiative to share the work of the hospitalized colleagues, the HR department arranged for people to visit, and some people also took on the task of communicating with the injured family members.

Therefore, girls in the workplace must not be as delicate as possible, nor do they have to become completely men.

The question of which style is better depends on the needs of your job temperament and your own personality characteristics to continuously debug, and finally form your own unique style and better participate in team interaction.

The first point that needs to be reminded is that if your style is more vigorous and decisive, it is very likely that friends and even leaders around you will persuade you to be gentler and learn from other girls to be more delicate.

At this time, you must be vigilant. The intentions they say may not be bad, but they are actually limited by gender stereotypes. You don't have to be "what every girl should be." "Everyone else is like this, so should you" is a false proposition in itself.

Of course, even if a boy is too arbitrary, it is not good for the job itself. Listening to other people's opinions and taking care of others' emotions are all very good traits, and they are not divided between men and women. Therefore, on the basis of adhering to your own style, learning more and drawing on some suggestions and methods that you do not have or are not outstanding yourself are soft skills that professionals in the workplace need to continuously cultivate.

The second point that needs to be reminded is that if you let others let you in at work because you show weakness, or even welcome a group of old employees to take care of you because you show weakness. Well, I advise you not only to not be complacent, but also to be vigilant, because usually people are generous with kindness to people who are not a threat at all. Your frailty has made people look down on you.