At dinner, people who never take the initiative to toast are not 'promising', colleague: I just want to be quiet
A few days ago, I had a dinner party with my friend. During the dinner, my friend kept making me face. At that time, I didn't know what was going on. I always thought that my friend's eyes were uncomfortable. After this dinner was over, my friend pulled me into a hut alone and told me: In the future, you should not eat with such and such people.
I was curious at the time, why not eat with them? After listening to this, my friend smiled mysteriously and said, "You don't have any communication when you eat with them, and they don't show any toasts. These people don't know how to be humble when they eat, and they don't know how to toast others. This is the most important thing." People who don't understand basic etiquette, don't understand even the most basic words in the wine field, just eat stuffed gourds there, such people are useless and have no prospects for development.
If you follow them, sooner or later you will be dragged into the ditch by them. So is this set of theories told by my friends the truth in the workplace? Or say friends are nonsense, let's take a look at it together.
The limited number of friends and the importance of workplace dinners
First of all, we have to understand one thing: this sentence of a friend, if it is from a scientific point of view, is not necessarily a fallacy. Of course, friends are not as worthless as we think, so why can we come to such a conclusion? It is very simple, because we always need to understand a variable, what this variable is, is a fixed number of friends around us.
Maybe some friends are a little confused when they hear this. What do you want to say? Then we might as well make this sentence a little simpler. We will have friends in the workplace, but the total number of these friends is actually a fixed value.
It is impossible to say that we have 5 friends today, 10 friends tomorrow, and 20 friends the day after tomorrow. In fact, there are only 3, 5 or 5~10 friends who are really close friends or dead friends in the workplace. If there is more, you will not be able to operate the circle yourself.
Someone said something is wrong. You can see that there are many, many people in the circle of someone's family. One person knows more than a dozen people, and dozens of friends. Just one phone call can call forty or fifty people. A piece to contribute to the company.
I said: This is indeed the case, but the crux of the problem is that among these forty or fifty people, a large part of them are just ordinary friends, and there are still 3~5 or 5~10 friends in the inner circle. Some people who do not have much interaction in the workplace, and who do not have much say in the circle of friends, are regarded as friends in their inner circle, invisibly crowding out the friends of those with greater potential for development.
One does not matter, two do not matter, three and five are all like this, the circle of friends around us will determine our development direction , so this kind reminder from friends has played a role to some extent, even though I am included. may not be acceptable to some readers.
In the wine bureau, some people are not used to toasting or just bow their heads and eat like a gourd. They are either the technical backbone of the company or the marginal personnel in the company. This reminder from a friend is more or less for my own good, so the crux of the question is: Is there really no prospect of development without toasting in the workplace? Let's take a look together.
Wine culture may not be as good as we think
Some people always think: all business is discussed at the wine table, if you don't even know how to drink, you don't deserve to talk to me about business. Such an idea has existed for a long time, and Sooner or later we'll get rid of it too. The reason is very simple, because drinking is easy to make mistakes. In fact, the wine culture is only a part of many etiquette cultures.
We don't need to invisibly enlarge the wine culture. For the same reason, the role of wine culture may be very small. If you abandon one or two close friends purely on the basis of wine culture, and abandon those people around you who do not fit the circle purely on the basis of wine culture, it will be a big pit for your own development.
In the same way, if you just give up all the resources around you and all your friends and brothers around you just for the sake of being in the upper position in the workplace, if you just give up all the surrounding friends and brothers for personal development in the workplace, then there will be great resistance to your own development. Once the friends around you see your character, once the friends around you see the development orientation of making friends, and this development orientation is somewhat intriguing, it is likely to become a stumbling block for you.
In addition, it is enough to say some polite words when people gather at the dinner table, or we should uphold the most basic respect for those who have no obvious toasting gestures. After all, everyone has different opinions on wine culture, some people like it, some people dislike it, we can't make it difficult for others.